Post by Heightism Report on Sept 30, 2018 6:58:53 GMT
https://www.reddit.com/r/short/comments/9k3ycc/im_a_bartender_in_a_college_town_and_the_other/
OP is a bartender and overheard a daughter talking to her father about a guy she liked, and one of the first things out of the fathers mouth was "is he tall?"
So, the first comment was from a short girl saying
"Don't look into it so much, it could just be a question to create conversation. Also, as a short girl, I've been asked this so if I say "yes he is short", they can answer " omg your kids are gonna be very small!!" . If I say no, then there is an exaggerated expression of relief. But all this is often said by my best friends or family, who are allowed to make jokes about my height."
That is some seriously misguided baloney. First, let's start with her theory about it being just a comment to "create conversation."
First off, when girls reveal that they are dating a guy, the first words out of the dad's mouth are going to be a checklist of things that could make the guy "unworthy" of dating his daughter. "Does he have a job," "Does he live with his Mom," "Does he play video games all day" would be common questions asked to gauge how much of a loser the guy is. He even made the smart ass comment,
"I should hope so" in response to the daughter's proclamation that the guy is taller than she is. If this comment were made alone, it would seem to indicate that the father was making a joke about the daughter's height, and would've seem a bit less discriminatory, but the fact that he was immediately concerned about the guy's height when he was made aware of the guy's existence makes both comments seem a bit more judgmental.
Also, notice how he had no qualms about making this comment within an earshot of a short bartender. If his question would've been "is he black" or something of that nature, he probably would've been a bit more inclined to look around the room first before making such a comment, even if he was just joking. This illustrates that the guy has no reservations about appearing to have a distaste for short men, which makes sense because society doesn't influence people to hide their heightism, it encourages them to flaunt it.
Now, let's consider the fact that the short girl on r/short said that if she tells her family that she's dating a short guy, they make a wisecrack about how short their kids are going to be, but if she says the guy isn't short, they have an "exaggerated expression of relief" without mentioning any potential short kids. She can't use a "they're talking about potential short kids" cop-out when the kids aren't even mentioned, therefore, their exaggerated expression of relief is based on the fact that she won't be bringing a short man home. So, for that reason, they aren't making jokes about her height, which is her cop-out; What they are doing is expressing an intense level of satisfaction with the fact that she's not dating a short man. She begins her comment telling OP "not to look into it so much," then, she goes onto prove that OP and everyone else should offer an intense layer of scrutiny to such a comment.
Furthermore, she speaks of scenarios of her dating a new guy as if they are a weekly occurrence. She is claiming a level of expertise on the basis of this being something that happens frequently, which makes it reasonable to believe that she is somewhat of a serial dater. What the hell does someone who changes boyfriends more often than she changes her fingernail polish know about what a group of guys who are systematically shut-out of many elements in society need to "look into?" No thanks, short woman, I think we'll decide what needs looking into and what needs to be ignored.