Post by Heightism Report on Oct 30, 2017 2:28:53 GMT
Summary: There's an r/short thread where a 5'3 guy was happy about going on a Tinder date with a 5'7 girl. The peanut gallery at r/short offered a bunch of "F Yeah' rah-rah response, and of course, our good friend kawnfoooodinz was mentioned.
https://www.reddit.com/r/short/comments/79gkt1/went_on_a_date_last_night/
My Analysis: I just want to sprinkle some truth into the mix because none of the commenters have the life experience or the foresight to quite grasp the reality of the situation.
While on the date, the young man who posted the thread went Full-Garmin by making a comment about "needing to wear heels to the next date" since he's 5'3 and the girl was 5'7. The only option for a short man on a date is not to bring-up height. It's a no-win. As close as you can come to winning is the girl will "let the comment slide." After making such a comment, not only will the typical negative beliefs about short men creep into the mix, but in this case, where the woman is taller, he has put a big red mark on his forehead, especially considering the way women feel as though their femininity is diminished if they're seen with a short man. Even if she is one of those magical women who does not have a distaste for short men, does not think they are inferior, does not think they are less manly etc., she is still almost certainly going to feel a bit disenchanted that she's the taller one in the relationship. This might not be a barrier to a relationship, but it's certainly at-least a mild murmur in her mind. A short man should never make Garminesque comments on a date. Other people will make more than enough height comments if he ends-up dating her, so no need to give the "issue" any more energy.
With that out of the way, the main reason I posted this thread is to point-out how much is revealed in the things that WERE NOT stated by OP, and not noticed by the rest of the posters.
Notice how this was a Tinder date. It's common knowledge that Tinder is generally an App that people use for hookups or to explore their dating options, and many women use it to get free meals and attention. OP states that this particular woman invited him to her house for the first date. I'd be willing to bet that less than 1% of Tinder dates that aren't merely a hookup originate at the woman's house, but this date didn't even end in a hookup, on the contrary, they just ended-up talking. Also, notice how OP offers a bunch of chest-puffery and pseudo-confidence, but didn't make it sound as though a second date is on the horizon. The fact that they just hung-out and talked makes me think that maybe he didn't mention his height online, and she suddenly lost interest when he walked-in, then, opted to use her "I like you so much that your height doesn't matter" comment as a means to console him after his silly Garmin comment. Her "your height doesn't even matter" comment is revealing because it shows us that in her psyche, height usually does matter. Another possibility is that she knew he was 5'3, and opted to have him come to her house so she wouldn't have to be seen in public with a man who was shorter than her, or, she didn't want the judgment that comes with being seen with a short man in general.
No one on r/short noticed any of these red flags, therefore, this young man has no clue that he more than likely got friend-zoned immediately when he entered the room, or, before he even came over. If she knew his height beforehand, she might have decided to "give it a try" even though she felt apprehensive, and then decided that she just couldn't do it when he arrived. The people on r/short will offer cheerleading and machismo, but that type of fluff may cause the young man to continue to remain in situations where romantic feelings are one-sided, and he could end-up being used as a relationship supplement to help fill in the voids left when she starts dating Mr Tall, Dark, and Vapid. Short men need to learn to choke down uncomfortable truths before they can ever hope of developing productive life strategies. Yes, it could be possible that he found a unicorn who doesn't mind dating short guys, but it's delusional to ignore that there could be more to the fact that they met on a hookup app, she invited him to her house, and all they did was chat like they were having a slumber party. Furthermore, he made a Garmin comment to a taller woman, and in 99.99999% of situations, those comments make the woman assume negative things about the short man, in addition to making her feel like her femininity is being diminished. Short men should live their dating lives the way they feel is best suited to their personal tastes, but it is like walking across a busy street without checking for traffic if a short man enters the dating world without understanding the warning signs and red flags that indicate his height is affecting his romantic worth in the eyes of the women he pursues.
https://www.reddit.com/r/short/comments/79gkt1/went_on_a_date_last_night/
My Analysis: I just want to sprinkle some truth into the mix because none of the commenters have the life experience or the foresight to quite grasp the reality of the situation.
While on the date, the young man who posted the thread went Full-Garmin by making a comment about "needing to wear heels to the next date" since he's 5'3 and the girl was 5'7. The only option for a short man on a date is not to bring-up height. It's a no-win. As close as you can come to winning is the girl will "let the comment slide." After making such a comment, not only will the typical negative beliefs about short men creep into the mix, but in this case, where the woman is taller, he has put a big red mark on his forehead, especially considering the way women feel as though their femininity is diminished if they're seen with a short man. Even if she is one of those magical women who does not have a distaste for short men, does not think they are inferior, does not think they are less manly etc., she is still almost certainly going to feel a bit disenchanted that she's the taller one in the relationship. This might not be a barrier to a relationship, but it's certainly at-least a mild murmur in her mind. A short man should never make Garminesque comments on a date. Other people will make more than enough height comments if he ends-up dating her, so no need to give the "issue" any more energy.
With that out of the way, the main reason I posted this thread is to point-out how much is revealed in the things that WERE NOT stated by OP, and not noticed by the rest of the posters.
Notice how this was a Tinder date. It's common knowledge that Tinder is generally an App that people use for hookups or to explore their dating options, and many women use it to get free meals and attention. OP states that this particular woman invited him to her house for the first date. I'd be willing to bet that less than 1% of Tinder dates that aren't merely a hookup originate at the woman's house, but this date didn't even end in a hookup, on the contrary, they just ended-up talking. Also, notice how OP offers a bunch of chest-puffery and pseudo-confidence, but didn't make it sound as though a second date is on the horizon. The fact that they just hung-out and talked makes me think that maybe he didn't mention his height online, and she suddenly lost interest when he walked-in, then, opted to use her "I like you so much that your height doesn't matter" comment as a means to console him after his silly Garmin comment. Her "your height doesn't even matter" comment is revealing because it shows us that in her psyche, height usually does matter. Another possibility is that she knew he was 5'3, and opted to have him come to her house so she wouldn't have to be seen in public with a man who was shorter than her, or, she didn't want the judgment that comes with being seen with a short man in general.
No one on r/short noticed any of these red flags, therefore, this young man has no clue that he more than likely got friend-zoned immediately when he entered the room, or, before he even came over. If she knew his height beforehand, she might have decided to "give it a try" even though she felt apprehensive, and then decided that she just couldn't do it when he arrived. The people on r/short will offer cheerleading and machismo, but that type of fluff may cause the young man to continue to remain in situations where romantic feelings are one-sided, and he could end-up being used as a relationship supplement to help fill in the voids left when she starts dating Mr Tall, Dark, and Vapid. Short men need to learn to choke down uncomfortable truths before they can ever hope of developing productive life strategies. Yes, it could be possible that he found a unicorn who doesn't mind dating short guys, but it's delusional to ignore that there could be more to the fact that they met on a hookup app, she invited him to her house, and all they did was chat like they were having a slumber party. Furthermore, he made a Garmin comment to a taller woman, and in 99.99999% of situations, those comments make the woman assume negative things about the short man, in addition to making her feel like her femininity is being diminished. Short men should live their dating lives the way they feel is best suited to their personal tastes, but it is like walking across a busy street without checking for traffic if a short man enters the dating world without understanding the warning signs and red flags that indicate his height is affecting his romantic worth in the eyes of the women he pursues.